Younging. That’s a word coined by author Valerie Burton Bell in her book A Well-Tended Soul.* She says, even as our bodies become less reliable, we can continue younging on the inside, growing more lively in our spirits.
Author and minister, George MacDonald (1824-1905), would have agreed:
I like the sound of that—younging and ripening with fresh life within. Maybe you do too. (Even if you’re under fifty, you can still determine to choose younging when the time comes.)
The question is: How do we achieve it?
Perhaps the best answers come from those who’ve gone before us who demonstrated lively, spirited living into their eighties and nineties. How did they swell with fresh life within?
1. By serving others
My parents modeled this strategy. Even when arthritis caused painful challenge for Dad, he served at the church food pantry, assisted in the kindergarten Sunday School, and read to students every week at my nephew’s school.
Mom also assisted in the Sunday School, lavishing her love on children and parents alike. She sang in the choir, participated in women’s ministries, and volunteered at the church office.
Mom and Dad with their first great-granddaughter, 2010
“Experts in aging make a distinction between passive aging and purposeful aging. Successful, purposeful aging calls for continued involvement, relationships, discipline, and an attitude of faith” (George Sweeting).
I’m sure Mom and Dad never researched what successful aging entailed. It just came naturally to them, as an outgrowth of their love for Jesus and a desire to serve him.
2. By maintaining a positive attitude
Not only do joints get a bit rusty as we age, our attitudes can start to corrode. It’s so easy to let negative thoughts grate in our minds, or respond to “How are you?” with creaking complaints.
But a positive attitude contributes to joy, and joy works like oil, lubricating our spirits. In addition, the oil of gladness tends to overflow, providing positive impact on those around us.
My father-in-law was just such a person. To those who asked him, “How are you,” his stock response was: “If I felt any better, I couldn’t stand it!”
Mom & Dad Ruegg, 1983
That’s the kind of attitude I want to foster—not for the purpose of reaching my nineties as he did, but to avail myself of the abundant, overflowing joy Jesus provides (John 15:11) and then share it with others.
3. By keeping a sense of humor
A cheerful heart is good medicine (Proverbs 17:22a), perhaps all the more so as we age.
And no one had a more cheerful heart than Hazel, a merry senior in the fourth church my husband pastored. She was the one with a bicycle horn on her cane.
One day, in a phone conversation with her adult son, she informed him of her date that evening.
“A date?” Andrew inquired, more than a bit surprised that his widowed mother, now in her late eighties, would be venturing out on a date. “With whom?”
“His name is Michael.”
“And where did you meet Michael?”
“At church.”
“Where are you going?”
“Out to dinner.”
“Well, tell me about this Michael.” Andrew prodded.
“Oh, he’s the nicest young man—you’d like him.”
“Young? Just how old is he?”
“In his early thirties, I suspect. He…
“Mom!” Andrew interrupted. “What are you doing, going out with a man nearly a third your age?!”
Hazel finally admitted to Andrew he had nothing to worry about. Michael was on staff at our church, his wife (a nurse) was on duty that night, and Michael had offered to pick up Hazel and be her “date” for the Senior Sunday School Class banquet.
Younging—by serving others, fostering a positive attitude, and keeping a sense of humor– certainly contributes to those pleasures.
Thank you, Father, for the opportunity of younging as we age,
providing numerous delights as we do so.
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What younging strategies have you adopted in your own life or observed in others? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below!
*Zondervan, 1996.
Art & photo credits: http://www.wikimedia.org; http://www.canva.com; Nancy Ruegg (2); http://www.canva.com; http://www.pikist.com.
From the Inside Out 