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It was late afternoon when the doorbell rang.
Through the sheer curtain at the window I could see D., from down the street. She and I had recently met and were becoming good friends.
“Is everything okay?” I asked while ushering D. inside.
“Oh, yes. It’s just…I have a present for you,” she replied. Sure enough, D. was carrying a wrapped box. We sat on the living room couch.
It was not Christmastime, and not my birthday. Why was she giving me a gift?
“Open it,” she encouraged.
“But, D.,” I hesitated.
“Go ON!”
Upon removing the paper and taking the lid off the box, I beheld a lovely navy blue Bible with gilded pages.
Now you need to know, D.’s husband and mine were in seminary at the time. Neither of our households had much money to spare. So this gift seemed over-the-top extravagant to me. Of course I could not accept it.
“D., this is absolutely beautiful, but…”
She stopped me. “I chose to buy this for you; I want you to have it. Besides, if you won’t receive it, you’ll steal my blessing!”
D. was referring, of course, to Acts 20:35: It is more blessed to give than receive.
I had never considered that interpretation, but she was right. In order for a giver to be blessed, there does need to be a receiver.
“Besides,” D. continued with a grin. “I already wrote inside the front cover. I can’t take it back. So there!”
D.’s words of that long-ago afternoon still play in my mind when I find myself balking at unexpected or overly-generous gifts. Even favors can make me uncomfortable. But if I don’t graciously receive, I steal the blessing from the giver.
And what’s at the bottom of my reluctance? A sense of unworthiness and pride. Now there’s a strange set of opposites!
D.’s gift made me feel unworthy. I wasn’t deserving of her sacrificial gift.
Yet pride was part of my reaction, too. I didn’t need her gift. I already had a perfectly good Bible. Yes, it was an old and worn King James version, but it had served me well and could certainly continue to do so.
What I began to understand that day is: receiving well is in itself a form of generosity. When I graciously express heartfelt gratitude for a gift, and share my appreciation for the time, effort, and thoughtfulness of the giver, I make a positive contribution of affirmation into her heart.
After D. left that day, I remember tearfully reading her inscription, and fingering the gilded pages. I felt incredibly honored, loved, and appreciated by D.’s gift.
Now, if it’s more blessed to give than receive, I wonder what D. felt as she walked home that afternoon? I pray she, too, felt honored, loved, and appreciated, even though my gratitude seemed paltry.
But surely the greater blessing came as God loved, honored, and appreciated D. for her gift.
Heavenly Father, I thank you for D.’s example, still strong after all these years. May I never miss an opportunity to be a blessing to others, whether I am the giver or the receiver.
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What lessons have you learned from the givers and receivers in your life? Tell us your story!
This is a lovely story, well told, Nancy. Thank you. Sometimes it’s tough to be on the receiving end. But usually, only a heartfelt ‘thank you’ is what is required.
You’re right. Key word: heartfelt. When I am on the giving end, the joy IS made full by that kind of response. Thank you for stopping by, Diana!
I loved this story. It gives me great joy to bestow unexpected gifts to people. I’ll see something (not necessarily spiritual-related), but something that ‘fits’ them perfectly and I want them to have it. As I write this I am anxiously awaiting a gift that I ordered for two people in my extended family. I can’t wait. It’s not that I want extra attention for doing this; it’s just for the sheer joy of it! And when someone does something special for me I am always so very honored and touched. And…this is a bit off topic, probably, but just this past year or so I have tried to make a mental note of a person’s name that I am speaking to on the phone (like a service providing person that I’ve called); and when we hang up I thank them for their help, using their name. I want them to feel like more than a contact for me to use. I want them to feel appreciated and acknowledged. I think that is sort of a gift as well. I love your blog!
What a great idea, Cheri, to contribute to the well-being of everyone with whom you have contact–giving the gift of worth. LOVE IT! Thank you, too, for appreciation of the blog. You’ve gifted me time and again with your encouragement!
Nancy, this story is beautiful, brought up some emotions of joy and love. I receive blessing from the caregivers that are precious moments. They unexpectedly give me gifts, and one particular one was a candle from a lovely lady P, the look on her face when she gave it to me was a proud moment for her and I still vision it. She is now in care of a cancer doctor with stage 4 cancer, but she is in my heart and the candle sits on my table with the lovely memory of when I received it.
Your story reminds me: Gifts keep on giving, long past the moment when an object changes hands. Your candle still warms your heart. But your friend may very well have a warm heart, too, remembering the gracious joy with which you received her gift. It would seem giving and receiving provide long-lasting dividends!